Dear Blake,
I will be graduating from medical school this week as the valedictorian from an Ivy League school, to become a brain surgeon. When I graduated from high school, I was valedictorian there too. Unfortunately, I have been cheating on exams my entire life. Over the past 8 years I would often pay other students to do my homework because I come from a very wealthy family. Both of my parents knew what I was doing and even paid some of the students on my behalf. The important thing to them is that I appear to be successful to keep our family name well known and respected. I’m debating if I should become a doctor. What do you think?
Signed, Daniel
from Hartford, Connecticut
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Dear Daniel,
Leaving the Ivy League with a diploma is the dream of so many people in this country. For me to state that your family is dysfunctional, is putting it mildly. If it’s important for your parents name to be well known, CNN can make that happen, providing that they can convince a judge to allow cameras in the courtroom during their trial. People have often wondered if stupidity is genetic or learned. You have proven that it can be both. However, if you decide that you want to have a career of opening up people heads, for the sake of publicly safety you need some practice. So, let your first two patients be your mother and father. Considering their wealth, they’ll probably arrive at the hospital in a chauffer driven luxury car. And with your skill level, they’ll definitely leave driven in a luxury vehicle… a hearse. I hope this helps.
Blake
LOVE!