Dear Blake,
For the past five years, I have been dealing with my aunt, who is convinced that the neighbors are coming into her apartment, hacking her phone, her refrigerator, threatening her, cooking in her kitchen and constantly talking about her. Everyone has tried reasoning with her, but she insists she’s OK and nothing is wrong with her.
She has fixated on these neighbors ever since she had a run-in with them years ago. They don’t even live there anymore, but she says they do. I’m trying to be kind, patient and understanding with her, but she is making me nuts. Please help.
Signed, Maurice
From Arlington Heights, Virginia
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Dear Maurice,
It’s obvious that your aunt has some serious mental health issues. Rather than being critical of her problem, have fun with it… at her expense. Here are some suggestions. Tell her that she is right about her neighbors, because they created a way to become invisible, and they posted some videos of her doing some really embarrassing things inside her house, that’s gotten over 10 million views on Youtube. Or, you can tell her that her neighbors are actually cannibals, and they sneak into her kitchen to determine what seasoning you really like, so they can sprinkle it on her as she is being slow cooked. And you may like this idea. Tell her you are taking her somewhere to get her a really nice massage on her forehead, but in reality she’ll be getting scheduled lobotomy. And finally, explain to her that her neighbors are harmless and are not going to ever hurt her in any way, shape, or form. Then tell her that you know this for a fact, because you spoke to them and they said they want to take her with them when they go home for a fun filled weekend… on Mars. Also emphasize that you believe they were telling the truth, as you looked into both sets of their eyes. I hope this helps.
Blake