Dear Blake,
My best friend of nine years, “Sierra,” and my boyfriend of two years, “Jaden,” strongly dislike each other. They were both at a cookout I had for my birthday, and Sierra kept making passive-aggressive comments to and about him.
At one point, she criticized something controversial that he said, and when he tried to engage her in conversation about it, she ignored him and pretended he didn’t exist. Jaden then launched into a series of verbal attacks against her, and although I attempted to get him to drop it, I was unsuccessful.
Sierra ended up leaving, telling me she needed to take a break from our friendship. She has since unfollowed me on social media, leaving me with the impression that our friendship is over because of the argument between her and my boyfriend.
I know Jaden was more at fault, and we have discussed the situation at length, but Sierra isn’t willing to talk to me about it. They’ve never had an interaction like this, ever. She’s never liked him, and I know she will never move past this. If Jaden and I were to break up, I don’t know if I could bring myself to resolve things with Sierra because I feel like she was unwilling to preserve our friendship. Please help.
Signed, Gloria
From Dallas, Texas
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Dear Gloria,
Having two people that are close to you competing for your attention can be awkward and stressful. You’d probably object to my initial idea, which was to backhand the next one that crosses a line, so I came up with some other options. Encourage Sierra to get a boyfriend, and tell her you’ll even set her up with some desperate guys who have very low standards, that will ignore her irritating personality. Or, tell Jaden he should feel flattered that another woman is thinking about him, and then allege that when he’s not around, you rarely think about him, and you often even forget what he looks like. Or, try this. Tell them they’ve both worn out their welcome, you don’t want to ever see either of them again, and you’re currently looking for a new set of losers to hang out with. On the other hand, the friction between them could be a ruse, and they’re secretly very interested in each other. So, I suggest you stop by his place late at night without calling. And don’t be surprised if Sierra answers the door wearing a very sexy nightgown… that Jaden stole from you. I hope this helps.
Blake