Dear Blake,
I’ve been married 30 years to a man who is a good person in every way except one. He lies to me. It’s mostly about inconsequential things, but over the past six months, his lies or omissions have rocked the foundations of our marriage. He does it typically to cover up behavior he’s ashamed of.
He has promised to be more truthful and transparent, but recently I caught him lying about something I saw with my own eyes. When I called him on it, he admitted the truth. Each time, he swears he will do better. Is he a pathological liar? I feel like I’m at the end of my rope, but I hate to throw away 30 years of marriage and maybe many more if it’s something that can be addressed. Please help.
Signed, Viola
From Raleigh, North Carolina
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Dear Viola,
It’s very unfortunate that you have married a compulsive liar. He wouldn’t know the truth if it slapped him in the face, and that’s a second option you should literally consider exercising. Anyway, here are some other options. Tell him every time you catch him in a lie, you’re going to use a taser on him, to the point where feels he’s on death row walking toward the electric chair. Or anytime he lies, tell even a bigger and disturbing lie, that has him so rattled, that he becomes an emotional wreck. Only tell him the truth after he seeks medication to calm his pathetic nerves. Or this idea. Publicly shame him when he lies, by posting what he said on Facebook. Follow that with a contest on who can call your husband the most offensive name, limiting 50 entries per person. And this last option. Do a very extensive background check, to determine if your husband’s current name is his actual birthname. If it’s not, do an international background check to determine what terrorist group he’s affiliated with, how much the reward is for giving info that’s lead to his capture, and where you’ll go to a on your next vacation… after paying cash for a new home. I hope this helps.
Blake