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BREAKING NEWS – Sacramento, California – Governor Jerry Brown announces that it is costing the state of California millions of dollars to remove the skeletal remains of drivers stuck in traffic during rush hour on the Harbor Freeway for prolonged periods of time, which is the most congested highway in America. Brown stated that last week city workers removed 25 bodies that had been bumper-to-bumper for so long, that many of them still had a trunk full of Christmas gifts.