PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS (ASSUMING YOU LIKE REALLY BAD ADVICE) ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!
BREAKING NEWS – Assisi, Italy – Pope Francis I proudly shows his newly purchased 2014 Popemobile. He stated that the customized vehicle has cruise control, bulletproof windows, and a special compartment that will conceal priests trying to skip town to avoid being prosecuted for several counts of pedophilia.