BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – The Teacher’s Union continues to protect their members from being fired, even though many of them have been charged and convicted sexual of abuse, rape, and theft of school property. In a written statement, the president of the union Randi Weingarten, explained that “Even though these teachers have committed a variety of crimes, the important question is, are their illegal activities hindering their ability to motivate the students/victims to excel academically? We will still protect all teachers no matter what has been proven that they’ve done, until a conclusive study is done to determine if teachers that have become felons are less efficient than the teachers without a deplorable criminal past”.