BREAKING NEWS – Madison, Wisconsin – Jesse Jackson arrives in the state capital to lend his support to the unions after he was informed of how many cameras were there. He stated at a press conference that he felt compelled to come to Wisconsin, so he could interact with as many white people as he could, because according to Jackson, since President Obama got elected, most blacks don’t take his comical 1960’s tactics serious anymore. He concluded by saying that it is very frustrating knowing that he can no longer manipulate his own race as efficiently as he could in the past.