BREAKING NEWS – Hollywood, California – Kim Kardashian announces that she is pregnant with her second child with rapper Kanye West. Obstetricians are now saying that this new addition to their family should be extremely grateful that Kim and Kanye will be their mom and dad. They explained that because if the baby was born with poor parents, its genetic combination of being empty-headed and egotistical makes it highly unlikely that the child would ever accomplish noteworthy in their entire life, and would remain penniless, misguided, with an insatiable desire to do something idiotic at social functions.