BREAKING NEWS – Toronto, Canada – Scientists finally believe they understand Pluto’s ice towers. The erosion-formed features called penitentes, rise over 1,600 feet tall– that’s higher than the Empire State Building– and stand about two to three miles apart. John Moores, an assistant professor of space engineering at York University in Toronto, said in a statement, “either it took tens of millions of years for these features to form on the dwarf planet who’s temperature is around 400 degrees below zero, or these giant structures were recently built as low income housing for Plutonians that regularly struggle to pay their monthly heating bill.”
