PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS (ASSUMING YOU LIKE REALLY BAD ADVICE) ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!
BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – Navy Secretary Ray Mabus is denying allegations that Osama bin Laden’s body was literally booted from one side of the aircraft carrier USS Carl Vinson to the other, before it was buried at sea. He added that it was just a coincidence that the Navy had on board, the top ten placekickers from the NFL.