BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – Eight different models for a proposed border wall have been tested and the results should spell good news for President Donald Trump, because all of the prototypes proved to be virtually impassable after some rigorous testing. Illinois Congressman Luis Gutierrez was so outraged upon hearing the news, that he stormed out of the President Trump’s State of the Union Address. “That madman in the White House is trying to prevent people from Mexico, any chance to enter this country illegally,” he angrily stated outside the Capital Building. “How low can this racist stoop? And I’ll tell you what, after the wall is complete, if any immigrants are injured trying to scale that pointless structure while trying to sneak into America, I will encourage them to sue the United States for every penny we have, assuming they can figure out some way to get into this country and file a lawsuit.”
