BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Hillary Clinton raised more than a few eyebrows when she lead a church in prayer. After scanning the audience with a very menacing stare, she clasped her hands, bowed her head, and began to pray. “Heavenly Father, in the bible you lobby for forgiveness, and I have learned it. I have forgiven America for rejecting me… twice. I have forgiven the traitorous women and blacks and Hispanics that did not vote for me in 2016. I have forgiven Donald Trump for taking what I was entitled to, which violated your ‘though shalt not steal commandment’. And if you allow me to win in 2020, I will promote every one of your causes, as long as they don’t contradict any of the liberal agenda or suppresses the lining of my pockets. In your son’s name… uh… um, whatever that is. Amen.”
