BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – A large painting of former President Bill Clinton wearing a blue dress similar to that of Monica Lewinsky’s and red heels was found hanging in the New York City mansion of disgraced financier Jeffrey Epstein, who recently died in an apparent suicide, according to several reports. “It was hanging up there prominently — as soon as you walked in — in a room to the right,” the unidentified source told the New York Post. “Everybody who saw it laughed and smirked.” In response to the painting, Bill Clinton commented on the artwork at an impromptu press conference. “I am not a crossdresser in no way, shape, or form,” explained the former president. “I was wearing the colors of the flag to show that I am patriotic?” When asked if that’s true, where was the color “white”, Clinton answered, “You couldn’t see them, but that was the color of my matching bra and panties.”