BREAKING NEWS – Edinburgh, Scotland – Two space scholars have warned that astronauts may turn to cannibalism if humans do not prepare enough for the rigors of colonizing outer space.
Charles Cockell of Edinburgh University described the various difficulties space colonists might face, but he highlighted that the greatest concern very well could be a very old and familiar one: food security.
Cockell stressed that colonizers need to ensure farming and crop systems operate properly or they could find themselves in a similar situation to Sir John Franklin’s 1845 Arctic exploration, which resulted in the crew cannibalizing each other.
Dr. Cameron Smith stated that it will prove vital to “establish a really good farming system and put in a lot of stored food.” He then went went a step further, and boldly stated, if cannibalism takes place, on the menu may be “filet of astronaut”, and making something like jelly by adding fruit to ground up human remains to be placed on toast for breakfast, calling it “space jam”.