I recently went out for the first time and bought some goldfish because I haven’t had a pet in a long time. I figured I could love them just as much as I loved the dogs I’ve had over the years, and treat them the same way. After a few weeks, I’m happy to say that I am really crazy about them. But I hate having to constantly mop the floor around their bowl when the water splashes out, after I hit them with a rolled up newspaper for not doing what I tell them to do.