BREAKING NEWS – Clemson, South Carolina – An administrator at Clemson University Shawn Jones, stopped a man from praying on campus because he was not in a free speech zone. President James P. Clements stated that any student who violates the rule, risks disciplinary action, including expulsion. “We will not tolerate such behavior”, explained Clements. “Our staff has been told to confront anyone that even appears to be praying. For example, students are not allowed to walk or stand with their head down, wearing an expression suggesting that they’re deep into thought, unless it’s in the free speech zone. We’ll stop and interrogate students with that provocative posture, because we view it as ‘probable cause’”.