Dear Blake,
I have twin girls that are 15 months old. They seem to communicate with each through baby talk, even though I have no clue to whatever they’re saying. Is it possible they are speaking in a language that only they can understand?
Signed, Darlene
From Cleveland, Ohio
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Dear Darlene,
Scientist have been investigating your question for decades. Most of them have concluded that not only is it possible, it’s dangerous… for you. Children that age have no moral compass of what is right or wrong, and it is highly likely that they are planning to do some horrific things after they are able to form more one syllable words, like “knives” and “rope”. To counter their eminent viciousness, it is important that you drill in their heads at an early age that they can be tried as an adult no matter how old they are. Say this to them regularly, even while they are displaying their scheming smirks as they’re gobbling down baby food. As they go from crawling to walking, do not be surprised if possessions come up missing as well as family members. I would also suggest that you read every article or book you can get your hands on regarding female predators and sociopaths. The best advice I can give you is to separate the two of them permanently so they are not eventually unleashed as a team in your community, and this can be accomplished by find two loving childless couples at both the North and South Pole. I hope this helps.
Blake