Ask Blake Picture111

Dear Blake,

I am the homecoming queen from my high school, and we have a tradition that the homecoming queen has to attend the senior prom with the male valedictorian. I don’t want to be seen with some geeky guy, when I feel I should be with a good looking star athlete. I am very pretty and I feel I deserve the best. What do you think?

Signed, Kym
From Orlando, Florida

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Dear Kym,

Senior proms are often of the most memorable times in a teenager’s life. I hope sometime in the future you can reflect on what and idiot you currently are. Twenty-five years from now, that “geeky guy” will probably be successful somewhere in the corporate world, while you’ll be working on your third marriage after your husbands continue to walk out of your life once they realize that other than your physical appeal, you’re nothing but a shallow brainless air-headed bimbo. Take a good look at your mother versus how she looked when she was in high school. If she was really attractive back then but looks wretched now, you can safely conclude that the exact same destiny awaits the likes of you. I personally believe that young egotistical floozies (including you) somehow accelerates the aging process. And I have no doubt that in about three decades when you reflect on how gorgeous you think you were at your prom, you will know then in the future that time has ravaged your perceived beauty so viciously, that you’ll be honest enough to admit that you couldn’t even come in third at a pageant, even if you were competing against detainees at your local animal shelter. I hope this helps.