Ask Blake Picture111

Dear Blake,

I just found out that I am pregnant. I am terrified of parenthood and so is my husband. Both of us were only children, and had fairly easy lives as kids growing up because we didn’t have any real responsibilities. We still want to have a total of four kids, but the fear is there, BIGTIME! Do you think we should be concerned?

Signed, Tara
From Lake Tahoe, Nevada

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Dear Tara,

The nervousness and fear both you and your husband have is understandable. But unfortunately, you both will soon realize that all of your concerns are justified… and then some. The odds are, with four kids you’ll have at least one worthless loser, if not more. During the “terrible twos”, you’ll serious consider putting your whining brat up for adoption, or maybe leaving the child at the doorstep of an orphanage because it wouldn’t involve any paperwork. If you decide to keep these hell raisers during the toddler period, be prepared when they become about five or six, when they torture you daily by constantly asking you idiotic questions, that makes you look like a moron if you don’t know the answers. However all of that is nothing compared to what they become once they’re teenagers. I can almost guarantee you that at some point from their ages from 13 to 18, you will spend money from either going to a therapist to help maintain your sanity, or going to criminal defense lawyer to determine what is justifiable homicide. I hope this helps.