Dear Blake,
I have a neighbor, “Mrs. Smith,” whom I see often in another neighbor’s yard, “the Joneses,” when they are not home. I have seen Mrs. Smith pick vegetables from their garden and take them to her house, and Mr. Smith connect extension cords that run to their home in the winter months when the owners are away. The Smiths are at least in their 60s and well off. While it’s possible the Joneses don’t mind sharing their garden and electricity with this couple, it does seem unusual. We have security cameras in our yard to discourage the Smiths from coming onto our property. Should I tell the Joneses about these people and, if so, what would be the best way to approach the subject? Or should I just mind my own business? I would consider someone a good neighbor if they told me someone was coming onto my property like this, but I can’t assume that others feel the same way — especially since they seem friendly toward each other and share a property line. What would a good neighbor do?
Signed, Harold
From Helena, Montana
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Dear Harold,
It’s always a good idea for neighbors to look out for neighbors. And if you find out that Joneses know nothing about the Smiths, I think you would be in your rights to blackmail them. Here are some options. Tell the Smiths that if they don’t pay you a certain amount of cash, that you will expose them as thieves to their employers, all of their neighbors, and local grocery stores. If they are struggling financially, make them work it off by doing your landscaping, auto maintenance (including farming equipment), and maid service. If the Joneses were unaware and they want to make the Smiths pay a price, they should have you film those freeloading crooks, and give it to the police, and also allege some very expensive jewelry was also stolen from the house, the cops will believe it. But if you really don’t want to get involved, but you still want to teach the Smiths a lesson, then do this. Every night before you go to bed until morning, run a cord from their house to yours, for several of your power draining appliances like your washer, hot water heater, and refrigerator. And those losers will be completely baffled at why their electricity bill continues to rise, even though they are regularly ripping off their neighbors. I hope this helps.
Blake