I am hurting because my mother favors my brother. I talked to her about it a few times, but she said it hurts her when I say things like that. I don’t bring it up to her now, but I am very troubled by it.
I have invited her to visit so she could meet my fiancé but she refuses. She says it’s too long a drive. I miss her tremendously and want to see her. My fiancé told me to give it time, but I don’t think it’s fair. What can I do about this situation?
From Rutland, Vermont
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What your mother doing is very hurtful and insensitive. In my opinion, you must turn the tables and openly favor your father, until she feels like she ain’t worth squat. Here are some ideas. Start taking his side on every issue, even if he has facts totally wrong, and then accuse your mother of being a pathetic wife that never backs her man. Ask her why she has aged so terribly, adding that because your dad aged so well, when they are together in public, it appears he’s hanging out with his great grandmother. Or, you can tell her you enjoy watching sports with your dad because she’s way too stupid to understand the rules of any game. And finally, tell her if she wants to feel equal to your dad, to start doing some of the work that he does, like cleaning the gutters on the roof. And while she’s up there, look at her with an extremely menacing stare as if you plan knocking the ladder over… and then do it. I hope this helps.