Dear Blake,

I am a fourth grade student who is, let’s say, good at math. I usually finish my math homework easily, but lately it’s been piling up. The problem is, my classmates ask me for help a lot. I enjoy helping them, but sometimes it’s hard to explain things, or I can’t find the time to get my own work done.

The teacher is usually doing a math group with other students, so my friends can’t ask her. Should I fall behind by helping my friends or focus on my own work and risk hurting their feelings?

Signed, Freddie
From Biloxi, Mississippi

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Dear Freddie,

I am very impressed with your math skills and you sound look a very smart boy. But you should not neglect your priorities, simply because you are surrounded by idiots. Here’s some advice on how to handle them. You can start charging them for your assistance, and they can pay you by giving you their allowances, their lunch money, or even their lunch. Or, you can start charging their parents for tutoring their moronic kids. I believe that the parents will pay you, or risk their kids living with them after they grow up, indefinitely jobless. Or this idea. Give them a motivational speech, emphasizing how stupid they are, and maybe that will encourage them to prove you wrong. But this is something you should keep in mind. Helping them really won’t change much, so you should accept the fact that when they become adults, they’ll be collecting cans for money, and going through restaurant dumpsters searching for their next meal. However, if you want to stay in contact them when they grow up, you should be able to find them in nearby homeless shelters, tent cities, or loitering in front of liquor stores begging passersby for pocket change. I hope this helps.