I was recently contacted by my graduating class to help organize a reunion. Since then, one of the organizers has decided that our committee is an inseparable trio who must get together regularly by Zoom and occasionally in person.
We were not in touch before the reunion and we have little in common, but I can tell she’s lonely, so I’ve indulged her so far. However, she now wants to convene periodically for long weekends at a nearby inn. I do not want to leave my spouse for long weekends or spend money and time on a person whom I don’t care to befriend.
When I’ve tried to demur with “unavailability” excuses, she insists we are a trio and we simply will wait a few weeks until I can find an open date. I don’t want to be rude, but I can’t figure out how to politely tell her that I have no interest in accepting her suggestions for an extended slumber party. How should I handle this?
From Seattle, Washington
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Your classmate may be lonely, but she’s also an overbearing pest. You must do something that will not only stop her from suggesting gatherings, but that will also make her regretting graduating the same year you did. Here are some ideas. Tell her that you’re a kleptomaniac, and she and your other friend cannot be around her with jewelry, car keys, or cars. Or, you can try to get her to kick you out of the trio, by alleging that you told some unforgivable lies on her in high school, including she ran an escort service that catered to the teachers. Or this idea. If she wants to go to an inn for a weekend, you can tell her that you have fits of uncontrollable rage when you’re sleep walking, and some of the deadly rage carries over until you’re awake for a few hours. And lastly, tell her you actually want to go to an inn for a weekend. But tell her you’re a recovering arsonist, so highly recommend that she and the other girl should go to bed using fire extinguishers for pillows. I hope this helps.