BREAKING NEWS – Los Angeles, California – L.A. Laker Kobe Bryant has put his name into the history books many times over, either by grabbing sole possession of records, or steadily working his way up the lists of all time greats. Unfortunately reaching many of those marks has also entailed a dubious distinction, including his most recent record of missing 13,418 shots in his career. Kobe explained after being informed of his latest accomplishment that the number would be considerably lower, if he wasn’t distracted by the coach and his teammates constantly whining for him to pass the ball.