BREAKING NEWS – Stockholm, Sweden – Openly gay Bishop Eva Brunne of the Lutheran Church of Sweden, has proposed the removal of all Christian symbols of the Seamen’s Church in Freeport to make it more inviting for visiting sailors from other religions, specifically, those of Muslim faith. Her plan calls for removing crosses and other Christian symbols while setting up a prayer room inside the church, because it would be less offensive to the tens of thousands of Muslims entering Sweden from the Middle East and North Africa as refugees. Brunne said she also plans to ban any mentioning of Jesus’ incredible accomplishments during Sunday services because not only does it offends atheistic visitors, and it irritates magicians that find it frustrating that they can’t replicate any of his miracles.
