BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – The CIA has announced it’s newest strategy for extracting information from captured foreign terrorists. It will involve the agents conducting the interrogation, to talk nonstop for hours if not days, about H2O until the detainee is tired of hearing about it. The process will be continuously mundane and monotonous, and will be referred to as “water boredom”. The ACLU states that they oppose this ruthless tactic stating it is a “form of torture”, and is now threatening to contact the Geneva Convention unless the CIA promises to make the subject more interesting.
