BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Hillary Clinton has now filed a lawsuit against Lisa Bloom, for not trying hard enough to get women to accuse Trump of sexual misconduct before Election Day 2016. In the court papers, Hillary doesn’t pull any punches. “Lisa Bloom did a substandard job in getting these women to say what my campaign needed them to say, shortly before the election,” Clinton stated in the court documents. “Bloom didn’t increase the bribery money high enough, or even conducted an extensive background check on these women, to find something she could blackmail them with, to ensure that they would say what was necessary during an emotional press conference, that they would’ve rehearsed and choreographed before going on camera. This lazy woman hasn’t done a darn thing to personally enrich me, increasing my net worth as I expected and desired. Thus, I am now adding Lisa Bloom to my excuses of why I lost, and the evidence is compelling to any objective person who understands the ruthlessness of politics.”
