BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – Yesterday early in the morning, at least twenty moderate democrats gathered in the nation’s capital with plans to run out of town, congresswomen Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Rashida Tlaib, and Ilhan Omar. According to witnesses, the angry democratic mob rivaled a scene from the film “Frankenstein” as many of them were aggressively waving weapons. However, after a few minutes their tempers subsided when they determined that the three women were entitled to due process. So instead, the moderate democrats are now planning on abducting the trio followed by an immediate Salem witch trial, stating that they were confident of a “historically consistent” unappealable verdict.
