BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is accusing Congress for mishandling violence in America for decades. “The problem with our elected officials,” she began, “is that they have been focusing so much on gun violence, that they have ignored other weapons that are regularly being used to injure and kill. So next year, I plan on introducing a bill that will require background checks on anyone trying to purchase a blunt object. And if the law passes, according to my sources this will reduce concussions and skull fractures by a whopping 80%.”
