BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Democratic presidential candidate Beto O’Rourke sounded the alarms, saying that civilization has only “ten years” left on Earth if no action is taken on climate change. “I know that Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez said the world was going to end in twelve years, but my info is more updated,” he explained to MSNBC host Chris Hayes. “These numbers are subject to change to an even earlier date, depending on how much attention I need as I continued to drop in the polls. And I believe that my ability to foresee things should be taken serious, because I predicted in February that some of my people would abandon me in ten weeks, and yesterday, two of my top staffers abruptly quit.”
