BREAKING NEWS – Cincinnati, Ohio – Hillary Clinton suffered a temporary hearing loss, after democratic presidential candidate Elizabeth Warren viciously slapped her in both ears at the same time from behind. It appears that Warren felt insulted when Clinton stated to the the cheering crowd, “Senator Warren’s nomination will ensure the end of sexism and bigotry toward very intelligent homely looking women.” Warren later said her actions were misunderstood, because she was trying to kill two mosquitoes that were hovering on each side of Clinton’s head. However, the police investigating the incident, refused to comment on why when the former Secretary of State was dazed and confused after getting “double slapped”, Warren reached in her purse and pulled out a tomahawk.
