BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – President Biden warned new members of his administration that he’ll fire them “on the spot” if they fail to treat others nicely.

“If you’re ever working with me, and I hear you treat another colleague with disrespect, talk down to someone, I promise you I will fire you on the spot,” Biden told new aides during a swearing-in ceremony following his inauguration. “On the spot! I know what I’m talking about, because from 2008 until 2016 when I was walking down the halls of the White House, people would constantly stop me and tell me how stupid I am. But as president, they’ll have to make an appointment to relay to me those exact same facts.”