BREAKING NEWS – Minneapolis, Minnesota – Rep. Maxine Waters, D-Calif., reportedly requested police protection during her trip to Minnesota over the weekend, where she made inflammatory comments that many have perceived as inciting violence in a region that has been experiencing intensifying protests.

Her rationalization raised more than a few eyebrows when she spoke at a rally. “I requested police protection for two reasons,” explained Waters. “The first one is, so I can personally monitor them. The more they are around me, the better I can assess what is wrong with them, and how can I fix their problems. And the second reason is, the more of them that are near me, the more black people in high crime neighborhoods don’t have to worry about police harassing them and arresting them for any crimes they may be actively committing!”