BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – Businesses and state governors are boycotting vodka in condemnation of Russia’s military action.

Drew Podrebarac started removing Russian Standard vodka from the shelves of Southern Spirit Liquor, the store he owns in Indian Land, South Carolina.

“The reaction was overwhelmingly positive,” Podrebarac told Insider.

“I think the vodka boycott is too aggressive,” said a local town drunk with slurred speech. “I wish instead our country sent some nuclear bombs to Russia, because then I wouldn’t be denied my morning Moscow meal.”