BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Long-struggling CNN had a historically small audience in February, particularly among the group of viewers needed to pay the bills.

CNN’s troubles were most significant among the advertiser-coveted demographic of adults age 25-54. CNN had its lowest-rated month in the category since May 2012, and its third lowest-rated month since the beginning of 2001.

“Anderson Cooper 360” and “The Situation Room with Wolf Blitzer” had their lowest-rated months in the category since June 2014, while “The Lead with Jake Tapper” had its worst performance since July 2014.

“Every time I think of these overpaid overrated left leaning buffoons, I get physically ill,” said CNN CEO and chairman Chris Licht in a leaked email. “If I paid them what they are worth to this network, they’d make more money as a greeter at Walmart.”