Dear Blake,

I have a question about nail-biting/finger chewing. We recently hired a new employee who is in daily contact with the public. She is a finger chewer, and her nails are bitten well below the finger tip. I am struggling with this because I had a childhood friend who chewed her fingers and it drove me crazy! What causes people to do this?

Signed, Alfred

From New York City, New York

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Dear Alfred,

A person can form the habit for a number of reasons. The most common reason is, the person is simply too cheap to buy a nail clipper. But here are some other possibilities. She might be doing something illegal and is worried about getting caught. According to FBI statistics, 92% of all embezzlers are nail biters. If both of you are stock traders on Wall Street, her habit would explain a lot. Because one day she may be worth millions, and the following day she’ll be collecting cans and considering selling a kidney, just to pay her rent. She could also be a cannibal with a split personality that’s slowly eating herself alive. However, my biggest concern is that it might be related to work place violence. She might be so irritated with you staring at her, that she knows she’ll pounce on you like a tiger, and attempt to scratch your eyes out. And because she is a sensitive woman, she wants her finger nails dull, so she doesn’t scar your eyeballs, while she’s scooping them out of your skull. I hope this helps.

Blake