Dear Blake,
I have an older brother who visits me often. Recently I discovered that in addition to eating snacks I put out, he has been sneaking food and things like canned beverages from my home when I’m not looking. He has money, that’s what makes me angry! What should I do?
Signed, Lawrence
From Freeport, Louisiana
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Dear Lawrence,
What your brother is doing is rude and disrespectful. The only thing I can suggest for you to do, is to turn the tables on him, being as vindictive as possible. Here are some ideas. Go to his house and remove both back tires of his car, and explain to him that you wanted to have 3 spare tires in your car, which included his two. Or, if you get the opportunity, “remove” his front door and take it to your place. Tell him there has been a string of home break-ins in your neighborhood, and you think his door is more secure than yours. Then suggest to him that until you return it, to temporarily use some shower curtains. You might enjoy this next idea. Get a hold of his credit cards, max them all out, and then remind him that only financially reckless people pay only the minimum monthly payments. However, if he is simply taking things from your kitchen innocently and he feels it’s ok because he’s your brother, I get it… so you should do the exact same thing to him. The next time he comes home from work, let him see you walking out of his house pushing a shopping cart, that’s holding all of his frozen food, his microwave, and his girlfriend. I hope this helps.
Blake