My 27-year-old daughter has issues due to a bitter divorce between her father and me. She treats us poorly, blames her problems on us and feels she is justified. How do I handle this? I don’t think she respects either of us much. As for our relationship, we get along as long as things are going OK for her. But if she’s having a difficult day, I get the blame. Advice?
From Woodridge, Illinois
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It sounds to me like your daughter is extremely self-centered. Just because you and your husband aren’t married, doesn’t mean you can’t join forces to put that ungrateful wretch in her place. Here are some ideas. Tell her the reason why you and her father got the divorce, is because both of you blamed each other for not putting her up for adoption the same day she was born. If she blames you for having a bad day, take responsibility for it, and tell her to stop whining or you’ll make the next day even worse. Turn the tables on her and blame her for your bad day, including how much money you feel you “squandered” by taking care of her until she struck out on her own. Lastly, tell her that you and your ex you were hopeful that she would grow up to be in beauty pageants and later possibly becoming a movie star, but because she started to look homely in her teen years, you and her father’s hopes were dashed. I hope this helps.