BREAKING NEWS – Chatfield, Minnesota – The Secret Service and the police had to restrain some grammar school students from injuring President Obama, after their initial smiles turned into anger. When one of the students shouted out how far the United States will be in debt when they became adults, the rest of them immediately became hostile and aggressive. Fortunately, the President only received a minor injury after one of the students hit him in the back of the head with a math book.