BREAKING NEWS – Erlanger, Kentucky – Michael Slaughter who is the CEO of Bicycle Cards, has stated that he is not going to yield to any pressure to promote the “politically correct agenda of any organization.”

“The requests are ridiculous,” explained Slaughter. “So far, I have been told by the LBGTQ community to discourage people while playing poker, to refer to five cards in numerical sequence as a ‘straight’ because it sounds homophobic. Gay men want the queens to be equal to the kings, some African-Americans wants spades to be renamed, and a group of cardiologists wants hearts removed altogether because they believe that suit mocks people with pacemakers.”