BREAKING NEWS – Tallahassee, Florida – Florida is reporting the lowest amount of coronavirus cases per capita in the nation after Gov. Ron DeSantis was widely criticized by media outlets for his handling of the virus.

The Sunshine State reported a daily average of 1,393 coronavirus cases as of Friday, six per 100,000, which was a two percent decrease over the last two weeks.

“He’s only doing it to pad his resumé in case he ever runs for president,” stated Congressman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. “If he didn’t have higher aspirations, he’d be like democratic governors who don’t flinch when people drop dead in their state from Covid. DeSantis’ motives are selfish and he should be ashamed of himself! Besides, he clearly stole idea of how to handle the virus from a democrat, and we’re just trying to figure out from who and when!”