BREAKING NEWS – Vatican, Italy – Pope Francis I took a swing at the Catholic Church’s leadership in Germany, reminding faithful in the country that the German bishops do not have the authority to propagate new theology or alter church governance.

The statement was released by the Holy See. In the message, the Pope expressed concern for the laity and clergy of Germany if their leaders break with established church teaching. The statement claimed that Catholics would be negatively affected by the many proposed changes to the church pushed by Cardinal Reinhard Marx and other liberal German leaders in their “Synodal Path.”

President Biden who is Catholic, backed the Pope. “What Cardinal Marx is teaching is theologically unacceptable,” explained Biden. “I’m pretty sure Archbishop Groucho, Bishop Chico, and Father Harpo backs their brother, and I disagree with all of them. I think Karl is the reasonable one in that family, and I’d like to hear his opinion on this and other social issues.”