BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – President Biden lit up social media after a pool report revealed that he told the “same story” at a fundraiser just minutes apart “nearly word for word.”

“After briefly touting his economic record, POTUS reflected on his decision to seek the presidency,” the pool report from Politico‚Äôs Jonathan Lemire, who was traveling with the president on Wednesday, stated. “He told the story about the events of Charlottesville in 2017 as the reason for his campaign. A few minutes later, he told the story again, nearly word for word.”

“This has nothing to do with dementia,” White House press secretary Karine Jean-Pierre angrily stated. “President Biden learns his speeches by listening to them on a vinyl album, but unfortunately in this case, the record skipped.”