Unconfirmed Breaking News

Deck the halls with boughs of holly
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
Throw salami at your mommy
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
Kick a cat and slash a tire
Fa-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la.
By some gas and start a fire
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la.

(In case you didn’t know it, I was a very troubled child).