COMMENTARY: I overheard a couple women stating that they had one. I believe if they would have studied harder, they could have gotten an A-section […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Is it ok to lie on your taxes, if you plan on spending the refund to stimulate the economy?
COMMENTARY: I personally believe that cheating the government (state and federal) is the responsibility of every decent American in this country. We need to do […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Before considering re-marrying an ex, how much whiskey would you first have to drink?
COMMENTARY: For me whiskey no. Cyanide yes.
Wacky Weekend Questions – Is there a certain food that you won’t eat under any conditions?
COMMENTARY: For me when growing up, it used to be fried liver. Gross!!! Who needs all that grease! But since then, I’ve changed my mind. […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Would you support a law that allowed the federal government to punish people that burned the U.S. flag, by either automatically sending them to jail for six months, or to set their hair on fire?
COMMENTARY: How about a third option. Tattoo a picture of the flag on their forehead, and then deport them to a country that hates Americans.
Wacky Weekend Questions – Suppose your seven or eight year old always did their chores around the house (suggesting a stong work ethic), if they could bring in a six figure income, would you send them to a foreign country to work in a sweat shop?
COMMENTARY: Obviously this would include weekends off and paid holidays.
Wacky Weekend Questions – Will there be an in flight movie during the rapture?
COMMENTARY: If it is, it will undoubtedly be rated G for General Audiences… or would the G be for Godly Audiences? Either way, as long […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Should children be used as pawns during a bitter break up?
COMMENTARY: My position is a resounding yes! Kids are great weapons! What other reason would you want to have these little ingrates? I can’t count […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Why was Osama bin Laden cleaned before the Navy tossed him in the ocean?
COMMENTARY: If I was on that aircraft carrier, and was ordered by my superiors to clean him, I would have also shampooed his hair and […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – If a suspect is finally apprehended after a high speed chase that exceeds more than 120 mph (even in school zones), should a judge give him or her a reduced sentenced if they properly used their turn signals when changing lanes while running from the law?
COMMENTARY: I think consideration should be given to would-be bank robbers, drug dealers, etc., that have enough integrity to follow the rules of the road […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – The Wizard of Oz is one of the most beloved musicals of all time. How many munchkins do you think it would take to feed an average size family of cannibals?
COMMENTARY: I guess it would depend if it includes a salad or not.
Wacky Weekend Questions – Would you support a law that would temporarily allow people that are struggling financially, to rob any of their neighbors with no consequences, until the economy turns around?
COMMENTARY: People’s home being regularly burglarized could actually stimulate the economy, since they would have to often replaced the items that are constantly being removed. […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Prior to the early 1970’s, teachers were allowed to initiate corporal punishment on students with rulers and paddles. If it improved a child’s learning skills and maintained order in school, would you consider reinstating this option to teachers, accept now allowing them to use blackjacks and brass knuckles?
COMMENTARY: As long as they had a school nurse, I have no objections.
Wacky Weekend Questions – What exactly is “legally dead?”
COMMENTARY: Can a person be “illegally dead?” And, if you kill someone while you’re “illegally dead”, can you be sentenced to “life?” This is confusing.
Wacky Weekend Questions – If you owned a large corporation, and found out that the newest executive was a childhood bully that terrorized the neighborhood (including you) would you: (A) Let go of the past and only consider their job performance. (B) Move them from their executive suite to the janitor’s closet. Or (C) Promptly give them a pay raise, encouraging them to buy a new home, car, etc. And after they make the purchases, reduce their salary by 80%.
COMMENTARY: I wouldn’t probably do any of the three. If it was in a tall enough building (preferably a skyscraper of at least 50 stories) […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Do you have any close friends or relatives that you’ve known most of your life, that you secretly wish to see rotting in prison?
COMMENTARY: It would probably be best if I didn’t list all those names, because if I did, I wouldn’t ever get invited to any family […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Do you feel you would be dishonoring a loved one if you buried them in the newly created casket for $159.95 made by Tupperware?
COMMENTARY: Only if they weren’t dead yet.
Wacky Weekend Questions – What exactly is political science?
COMMENTARY: I used to think it would involve a congressman or senator in a laboratory mixing chemicals trying to find a cure for something. After […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – What was the longest you ever went wearing the same pair of underwear, without taking them off?
COMMENTARY: I think I was around 22 when I wore the same pair for almost 6 months. I called the Guinness Book of World Records, and […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Women, what was your instrument of choice, when you busted out an ex’s windshield?
COMMENTARY: Conservatively speaking, I’m guessing 95% of you have done it. (Especiallly if you ever dated a moron that’s similar to me).
Wacky Weekend Questions – Comparatively speaking, most Americans bathe daily, as opposed to the Europeans, weekly. Do you think think this is just a cultural difference, or does the thought of embracing their standards of hygiene make you wanna gag?
COMMENTARY: I heard that the average European’s sense of smell, isn’t as keen as the average American’s. That would explain a lot.
Wacky Weekend Questions – If you won the lottery today and became an instant multi-millionaire, what steps would you be willing to take to hide it from your freeloading relatives and or in-laws? If you were married, would you consider having your spouse bumped off?
COMMENTARY: As far as my relatives, I’d hire an armed guard, with “shoot to kill” instructions, at anybody that appeared to resemble me. However, I […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – If a person’s friends, relatives and co-workers were unanimous that he or she is a complete idiot, would you support a law that would forcibly sterilize them to insure the supression of their genetic stupidity?
COMMENTARY: I don’t care if a law similar to this is ever put on the books. I already have a son, so they’ll have to (reluctantly) overlook […]
Wacky Weekend Questions
What was the craziest thing you’ve done or fantasized about doing to someone that dumped you? COMMENTARY: I feel that if you get dumped unexpectedly, […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Would you donate your organs at the time of your death, if you knew that if both of you went to heaven, the person(s) whom you donated your organs, have the option of selling your organs back to you at a modest profit plus administrative costs?
COMMENTARY: Red Cross and Blue Shield have not responded to my numerous emails regarding this question. My pastor told me, that to his knowledge, there […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – If a person is convicted of robbing a senior citizen with the use of a gun, should the defendant be given the option of either serving the maximum amount of time allowed by law, or getting pistol whipped by their victims?
COMMENTARY: I think this is a very good law that our elected officials should consider. However to prevent abuses, the pistol whipping must be stopped […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – If you found out that either your parents, children, or siblings were wanted by the police, (with a big reward) where would you later go for your shopping spree? (You could also use any expired coupons).
COMMENTARY: I personally would not like to see any of my relatives in jail. Prison would be more appropriate.
Wacky Weekend Questions – What was the stupidest thing you’ve said or done to the first person you had a crush on?
COMMENTARY: When I was around 7 years old, I had a crush on our next door neighbor. I found out one morning she was going to […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – If the United States reinstituted public executions (in stadiums) as they did over a hundred years ago, would you attend them if the price of season tickets were very reasonable? If no, what if they also had top notch halftime shows?
COMMENTARY: I left several messages at ESPN on this subject. To date, they still haven’t responded to any of my calls.
Wacky Weekend Questions – Should single women with no children, date only men with that have no children?
COMMENTARY: I totally believe that women with no children should only date men with no children. This gives them more quality time together. Time to […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Do you believe that the Attorney General of Indiana should fine Notre Dame, if they regularly discriminate against people with hunchbacks?
COMMENTARY: For the record, I never really liked that school.
Wacky Weekend Questions – Who in your lifetime has had the worst smelling feet?
COMMENTARY: When I was in the Air Force, I had a roommate’s feet that smelled like he regularly soaked them in buttermilk. On the upside, […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – How did your parents feel about your first date(s)?
COMMENTARY: The first lady I ever dated, my mother didn’t like her. The second one I dated, she didn’t like that one either. The third […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – After attending a very high class social function one evening; if you woke up the next morning (with a hangover), half dressed in a run down motel in a shoddy neighborhood, would you feel obligated to have breakfast with the sleazy person laying next to you that you don’t remember meeting, after you “nervously” went to the free clinic next door (before hitchhiking home)?
COMMENTARY: As I understand it, a balanced breakfast is always a good way to start the day.
Wacky Weekend Questions – For $100,000.00, would you hold your bladder for 24 hours?
COMMENTARY: And during that time you had to listen nonstop to a cd that played a serene waterfall.
Wacky Weekend Questions – Suppose you had some medical training, and a financially irresponsible roommate. If you were sure you could get away with it (because they were a sound sleeper and would never find out) would you drain a pint of blood from them once a month, and sell it to cover their fair share of living expenses?
COMMENTARY: I feel this is fair and reasonable. And at the time of the termination of the lease, if they were the cause of me losing […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Would you stay in a haunted house all night, if you knew that in the morning you would be given your dream home? What if at around midnight you started growing fangs and a tail?
COMMENTARY: I would probably still stay all night, and pray that I didn’t get fleas.
Wacky Weekend Questions – Women, what’s your opinion of stay-at-home dads?
COMMENTARY: I’m not talking about the sizeable group of you who have husbands or boyfriends that are under house arrest.
Wacky Weekend Questions – Do you think people that complain about secondhand smoke, but shop at garage sales, are hypocrites?
COMMENTARY: To me, the double standards are obvious. (In my strange world, my conclusions always make perfect sense).
Wacky Weekend Questions – What do you think should be done about the pathetic educational system in this country?
For me it’s simple, we should IMMEDIATELY close down all grammar schools and high schools and stop wasting the taxpayers money. The classes being offered […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – What are your New Year’s Resolutions?
COMMENTARY: Mine is to finally achieve my life long dream of becoming a supervisor at Woolworth’s or Montgomery Wards. (As usual, my sanity and standards are […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Is there anyone who consistently gives you pathetic Christmas gifts, that has had you fantasizing about bouncing it off of the back of their head (with considerable velocity)?
COMMENTARY: In my mind, I’ve fractured several skulls.
Wacky Weekend Questions – What was the quickest you ever got rid of a Christmas gift that a family member or relative gave you?
COMMENTARY: I’ve gotten several gifts from notoriously bad shoppers/relatives that I no longer open. Once I receive them, I usually drop them off at either […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Would you push someone down a flight of stairs if they were in your way and you were in a hurry to buy an item that finally went sale that you’ve been wanting on for months? If no, suppose the sale for the item was 50% off? If still no, what if it was a 2 for 1 sale?
COMMENTARY: I think smart shoppers will conclude, that being charged with an assault or possibly manslaughter for pushing someone down a flight of stairs is […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Under the assumption that she doesn’t have arthritis and is still alive, would you be concerned if your grandmother regularly flashed gang signs?
COMMENTARY: I wouldn’t be surprised if my grandmother did that. She’s in her mid 90’s and she’s been arrested and kick out of several […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – What was the strangest thing one of your parents used to whip you when you were young?
COMMENTARY: My mother was really mad at me one time and could find a belt. So she grabbed my little brother by the ankles […]
Wacky Weekend Questions – Should single women with no children, date only men that have no children?
COMMENTARY: I totally believe that women with no children should only date men with no children. This gives them more quality time together. Time to […]