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PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS (ASSUMING YOU LIKE REALLY BAD ADVICE) ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

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Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminNovember 16, 2023

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – A new report is shedding light on the “shattered friendships” between Warner Bros. Discovery CEO David […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminMarch 8, 2023

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – CNN has long referred to itself as “the most trusted name in news” and famously launched […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminAugust 19, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – “CNN will end its ‘Reliable Sources’ program on Sunday, August 21st. As a result Brian Stelter […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminApril 6, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Former CNN anchor Chris Cuomo sent a cryptic tweet about his future, possibly indicating that he […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminMarch 18, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Former CNN anchor Chris Cuomo is seeking a $125 million arbitration award, alleging that his former […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminMarch 9, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Former CNN boss Jeff Zucker has reportedly agreed to a deal with CNN parent company WarnerMedia […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminFebruary 10, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Multiple sources tell Page Six that Chris Cuomo, who was fired in December for helping his […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminFebruary 3, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Embattled CNN boss Jeff Zucker walked away from the liberal network after failing to disclose a […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJanuary 20, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – CNN host Don Lemon railed against people not vaccinated against the coronavirus, referring to them as “idiots” and imploring […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminDecember 14, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Embattled CNN boss Jeff Zucker’s liberal network is plagued by scandal, embarrassing headlines and struggles to […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminDecember 9, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – CNN President Jeff Zucker addressed Chris Cuomo’s stunning firing in a town hall with staffers, saying […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminNovember 17, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Fox News was the only basic cable network to average 1 million viewers, finishing the week […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminOctober 18, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – CNN political commentator Mary Katharine Ham sided with podcast giant Joe Rogan, who accused her employer […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJuly 19, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – CNN Worldwide president Jeff Zucker rose to prominence overseeing NBC’s “Today” during the Matt Lauer era, […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminSeptember 17, 2020

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – CNN’s go-to media correspondent Brian Stelter faced an avalanche of criticism for dodging questions surrounding the […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminSeptember 16, 2020

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Famed attorney and Harvard Law School Professor Alan Dershowitz filed a defamation suit against CNN seeking […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminNovember 20, 2019

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Protesters and activists from UltraViolet stormed the NBC headquarters in New York City demanding Comcast and […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminAugust 14, 2019

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – CNN is fast-tracking an all-black panel show, Page Six has exclusively learned. The struggling cable network […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminAugust 6, 2019

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – CNN’s Jake Tapper fired back Monday at “Squad” member Rep. Rashida Tlaib after she ripped him […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJuly 16, 2019

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Police shoot and kill Willem Van Spronsen who was allegedly armed with a rifle and throwing […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminMay 31, 2019

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – The New York Times is cracking down on its own reporters, stopping them from appearing on […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminMay 10, 2019

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – CNN boss Jeff Zucker has been forced to address online rumors that disgraced anchor Matt Lauer […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminDecember 20, 2018

BREAKING NEWS – Hamburg, Germany – Claas Relotius, a reporter and editor, admitted to fabricating parts of at least 14 stories following the magazine’s investigation. […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminNovember 13, 2018

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – CNN is still currently outraged that Jim Acosta no longer has access to the White House. […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminOctober 25, 2018

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Hours after CNN’s New York City headquarters were evacuated over an explosive device Wednesday, the network’s […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminFebruary 28, 2018

BREAKING NEWS – Parkland, Florida – A Florida student claims that CNN rewrote his question for the network’s town hall debate on gun violence. Colton […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJanuary 2, 2018

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – CNN put the “J” in journalism Sunday night, with a marijuana-themed New Year’s Eve show. During […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminNovember 3, 2017

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – President Trump’s Justice Department is reportedly mulling an antitrust challenge to AT&T’s proposed $85 billion purchase […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminAugust 28, 2017

BREAKING NEWS – Atlanta, Georgia – CNN has issued a public apology regarding Hurricane Harvey. They initially warned that people should evacuate every “golf course”, […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminSeptember 21, 2016

BREAKING NEWS – Atlanta, Georgia – When Donald Trump reasserted his support for profiling in order to combat the terror threat, his words apparently weren’t […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminDecember 7, 2015

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Republican presidential front-runner Donald Trump suggested that he may charge CNN $5 million to appear at […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminSeptember 11, 2015

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Donald Trump has an unusual proposal for CNN: He wants the network to donate its profits […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminSeptember 19, 2013

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – Once again “The Daily Show” host Jon Stewart gets big laughs over his criticism of CNN […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminApril 25, 2013

BREAKING NEWS – Los Angeles, California – In a controversial move, CNN adds New York City chef Anthony Bourdain to its Sunday night prime time […]

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