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Unconfirmed Breaking News

PURE SATIRE!!! UPDATED DAILY AT 7 AM PST (OR WHEN WE ARE GOOD AND READY) THREE BREAKING NEWS STORIES EVERY WEEKDAY, PLUS A PROBLEM SOLVING ADVICE COLUMN ON WEEKENDS (ASSUMING YOU LIKE REALLY BAD ADVICE) ~ TO REMAIN UPDATED ON WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD, RELY ON UNCONFIRMED BREAKING NEWS, BECAUSE WHEN THE NEWS BREAKS… WE'LL FIX IT!!!

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Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminMay 12, 2023

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot issued an emergency declaration in response to the surge of migrants since last month. Lightfoot […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminMay 10, 2023

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – While in her last few days in office, Mayor Lori Lightfoot said one of her biggest failures was not […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminApril 20, 2023

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – A good Samaritan who stepped in to help a couple who was brutally beaten during Chicago’s “Teen Takeover” is […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminMarch 6, 2023

BREAKING NEWS – New York City, New York – New York City Mayor Eric Adams stated that fellow Democrat Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot’s election defeat […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminMarch 2, 2023

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Ousted Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot explained away her Tuesday election loss as a result of her being a “Black […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminFebruary 23, 2023

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago mayor Lori Lightfoot, D, told South Side voters they should not vote at all if they do not […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJanuary 13, 2023

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot’s re-election was ridiculed by critics as her campaign touted her record on crime and sought […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminDecember 15, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot, D., is facing criticism for ignoring local media members who are critical of her administration […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminNovember 21, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot was swiftly ridiculed for decrying the mass shooting in Colorado, while her own city is […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminOctober 10, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Tyson Foods Inc. became the latest large company to announce its departure from Chicago, continuing a trend in the […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminSeptember 23, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot fired back at the CEO of McDonald’s after he highlighted the difficulty rising crime in […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminSeptember 12, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – The Republican mayor of a suburban Chicago town is calling out Windy City Mayor Lori Lightfoot after over 60 […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminSeptember 2, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Democrat Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot slammed Republican Texas Gov. Greg Abbott, calling him a “man without any morals” after […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJuly 28, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Elected Democrats in Chicago remained silent when asked by Fox News Digital how they planned on addressing plummeting arrest […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJuly 27, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Multiple police-driven vehicles used to transport Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot have reportedly racked up multiple traffic tickets that have […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJuly 13, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot is in Europe touting her city’s “thriving economy” as major companies announce they are leaving […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJuly 1, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot is standing by her profane attack on Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas after she yelled […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJanuary 14, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot allegedly called the owner of a high-end exotic car dealership an “idiot” during a heated […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJanuary 11, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Lori Lightfoot, the Chicago mayor, announced on Twitter late Monday that public school children in the city will be […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJanuary 10, 2022

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot again lambasted the city’s teachers’ union Sunday for refusing to show up for classes after […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminDecember 22, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Mayor Lori Lightfoot is calling on the federal government for help in combating crime and violence in the Windy […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminDecember 14, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Mayor Lori Lightfoot faced criticism last week after she responded to the recent flood of robberies in her city […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminDecember 9, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki distanced the Biden administration from recent comments made by progressives Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminAugust 20, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – More than two dozen Chicago police officers reportedly turned their backs when greeted by Mayor Lori Lightfoot at the […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJuly 14, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – Rochester, New York – Rochester, NY outpaces Chicago in murder rate as local officials embrace police intervention. As data shows that the […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJuly 8, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – President Biden met with Chicago’s mayor, in the wake of an extremely violent holiday weekend in the nation’s third […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJuly 2, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot says 99% of her critics are motivated by two things: racism and sexism. Her comments […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJune 21, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Mayor Lori Lightfoot threw some major shade at the Chicago Bears on Friday, just one day after the organization […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJune 16, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot furthered suspicions surrounding her office’s high turnover rate with a bizarre email she wrote to […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminMay 20, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot, D., defended her controversial announcement to only give individual interviews to journalists of color and […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminFebruary 2, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot is ordering teachers to return to the classroom amid an ongoing dispute between Chicago Public […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJanuary 15, 2021

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Mayor Lori Lightfoot’s comments this week on COVID-19 are a far cry from her “stay-at-home” orders for Thanksgiving. The […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminDecember 17, 2020

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – The Law Department of the city of Chicago this week tried to block a local TV station from airing […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminAugust 21, 2020

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Mayor Lori Lightfoot defended the Chicago Police Department banning protesters from the block where she lives, citing her right […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminAugust 18, 2020

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Taxpayers spent nearly $66 million fashioning McCormick Place into an emergency coronavirus hospital with 2,750 beds this past spring […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJuly 27, 2020

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Prosecutors charged three men in Chicago with federal gun crimes — the first charges under the Justice Department’s new […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJuly 24, 2020

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Hundreds of protesters demonstrated outside the home of Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot to demand defunding of the city’s police […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJuly 24, 2020

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot defended a series of insulting text messages sent to the city’s police union president after […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEW

by: adminJuly 23, 2020

BREAKING NEWS – Washington, D.C. – President Donald Trump announced he will send a “surge” of federal agents to Chicago as part of a plan […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJune 9, 2020

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Distraught Chicago officials complained to Mayor Lori Lightfoot — as looting and rioting swept through the Windy City — […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminJanuary 24, 2020

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot says she plans to endorse a Democratic candidate for president before the Illinois primary in […]

Breaking News & World History, Featured

BREAKING NEWS

by: adminSeptember 3, 2019

BREAKING NEWS – Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot clashed with Sen. Ted Cruz over the latest burst of gun violence in the city, […]

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